How Shopping Can Reveal the Truth of Your Friendship
By Rill Hodari
August 2018 (repost from March 2014)

I am a woman who was blessed to have grown up with a lot of sisters. This has allowed me to know what it is like to have non-competitive, supportive relationships with other women. One place you can often spot such female relationships is in the clothing store. In fact, shopping with a new girlfriend can tell you a lot about what your friendship will be like in the future. 



Does she spend all the time looking for things for herself?  Never helping you look for something?


This behavior indicates how self-centered she might be.  Is it all about her?



Is she supportive and compassionate with her comments on your clothing choices?  Or does she urge you to come out of the fitting room so that she and everyone else can see the too tight pants with your muffin top in full view?!


This indicates if she is empathetic to you and protective of your feelings.



When she finds that great dress, skirt or whatever that you both love, does she tell you there aren’t anymore or quickly goes and finds it in your size?


This indicates if she sees you as an equal who deserves the same good as herself and will support you getting it.



If you can’t seem to find anything in your size or style, etc. but she’s finding great things for herself, does she force you to keep going for hours on end or does she suggest you all duck into the nearest restaurant or movie to engage in something you both might enjoy?


This indicates if she can see the larger picture that this shopping trip is about quality time with you and thus if you are miserable, it is time to shift gears.  She can always go back on her own.



Does she shop at the same stores as you?  If not, does she go into your stores with you?


Again this indicates her ability to extend herself to you and your needs and not just stay focused on her own.



Does she tell you the truth (either joyfully or with compassion) with your personality in mind?


In other words, if she knows you have conservative taste and the dress you are trying on is a little form-fitting, does she warn you about it even if she herself would wear it?  This indicates if she recognizes and respects your differences and supports your happiness on your terms.


It also indicates her level of integrity with regard to telling you what she really thinks.



Does she hail the store clerk to help you?


In other words, she is on your side and works toward the goal of a good shopping experience for both of you.



Does she hog all the store clerk’s time and energy looking for things for herself and expects you to do the same?


This indicates that she might believe that the world revolves around her and the rest of us are just the help.





Rill Hodari is the Founder of a little bit of happiness LLC and , the first and only fashion on-demand discounting site.  For more information you can visit: